I’m not talking about a slip up every eight to twelve months.
I’m talking about a daily, weekly, monthly habit Are you well rooted into your local church, under the spiritual care of your pastors and elders, and accountable to a group of believers within that congregation?
Ever since Joshua Harris kissed dating goodbye in 1997, the dating vs.
courting debate has raged within the evangelical community.
That’s why I usually tell guys that, if they are dating, they should be ready to marry within a year to a year-and-a-half. So guys, ask yourself: Am I in a position to be married within the next year to eighteen months? You must settle this issue before you enter into a romantic relationship because you will not be fit to lead your girlfriend and future wife while you are on such shaky spiritual ground.
Are you able to provide for a wife or be in a position to provide for a wife within the next year to eighteen months? College freshmen who believe they met their future wives at orientation may balk at this statement.
Men: Initiate the Relationship and Keep on Initiating The idea that God has designed and called men to bear a unique responsibility to lead in their relationships to women has been challenged ever since the fall (Gen ).
The primary question here is whether you are presently caught in the habit of viewing pornography.I place this question on the list of considerations because God has designed the local church to be the place where our faith is grown, sustained, protected, and preserved (Heb -15; -24).If you are detached from the local church, you will soon be spiritually adrift and taking your girlfriend with you.As a result, if two people are “dating,” this could mean they have dated only twice, yet have become interested in pursuing marriage.Even if both were serious, and technically courting from this point (this is often the case today after just Also, because it sounds too “official” and “old-fashioned,” teenagers today rarely even use the term “dating.” The idea of a date—when a man formally asks a woman, for instance, if she would accept an engagement for dinner—is nearly non-existent.This is not to suggest that it is wrong, in every circumstance, for a woman to take the first step; what matters is not so much who takes the first step, but whether or not the man initiates the relationship from that point on.What does it mean to initiate a romantic relationship?In the past when I’ve asked guys about their intentions with the woman they are dating, I’ve often heard the biblical-sounding language of God’s will. It is good to live humbly under God’s sovereign will, for we cannot ultimately determine our future (James -18).But in his wise design, God has left it largely up to the man whether or not he will get married.If you find that you have answered “no” to one or more of these questions, do not allow yourself to be swallowed up in despair.Rather, ask yourself: What is keeping me from changing my “no” to “yes” in each case? God has given you every resource you need to have the assurance of your salvation, to provide for yourself and for a family, to put sexual sin to death, and to develop gospel relationships in your local church.